Stupid Questions with Lucy:Oscar Wilde is a Cheeky Bastard EditionFeaturing Destiny Moon

Happy hump day, Bloggie friends.  Today for your amusement I have erotic romance author Destiny Moon answering my fascinating questions.  She cracked me the hell up, so keep reading!  That's an order! 

1. If you could have one otherworldly alien ability or body part, what would it be and why?

Tentacles. If writing erotic romance has taught me anything, it’s that the more gripping and groping a character is capable of, the better. Let's just say I'm a little jealous of our friends, the octopi. 

2. What Smurf would you be?

Sassy Smurf. I’d have a wardrobe closet like Smurfette, but with more variety. 

3. Do you think the aliens who inevitably enslave the human race will treat us well or eat us? 

 If they enslave us, I hope at least they will have the decency to make it fun. That means no eating. 

3A. Follow up: What will you do to distinguish yourself to our benevolent overlords so that they don't destroy you with their acid flatulence? 

Develop a really great safe word. 

4. What's the best way to foil a ghost? A smart one, not one of those dumbasses in a sheet. 

Witches, of course. I know a couple, so I got this one. 

5. If you could slap the shit outta one beloved historical figure, who would it be and why?

Oscar Wilde. Because he’d like it. Actually, he’d love it. 

6. Cake or pie? And, if you said pie, why are you so happy to be wrong? 

Cake, hands down. Carrot cake with cream cheese frosting is my favorite, but a close second is decadent chocolate cake. In all honesty, I'm not picky. Bring on the vanilla sheet cakes with lard icing! 

About Destiny Moon: Destiny Moon's quest to follow her heart led her to writing erotic romance. With a few titles already out and and few more on the way, she is slowly inching closer to her dream, which involves tapping away at a story while on a beach sipping margaritas. Her latest release is Worth The Wait, a follow up novel to All I Ever Wanted.

WORTH THE WAIT

Sassy and glamorous, Monique Mackenzie has everything a modern woman could want - great career, fabulous home, wardrobe, car and friends. Men throw themselves at her constantly, but after years of meaningless flings, the charm has worn off. The one man who truly ignites her passion is the only man she can't have - her boss, Jerome Fontaine. 

Mysterious Jerome drops clues that he sees her too, but he seems to have a secret life outside the office. He remains elusive until Monique accidentally stumbles upon his secrets and discovers the reasons for his stoic behavior. As the fiercely private Jerome begins to trust Monique with his secret life, Monique's world is turned upside down with questions about what she truly wants out of life. Jerome's presence makes her question everything from her ambitions to her erotic tastes and in falling for him, she must face her own demons. 

Just when she thinks she's got it all figured out, Monique finds herself challenged in ways she never imagined, but the one thing she knows for certain is that she has never loved anyone as much as she loves Jerome.

Dear Time Magazine:I’m Tired of the Word “Feminist,” too.

Dear Time Magazine*,

Boy, “feminism.” What a pain in the ass, amIright? Fighting tooth and nail to be considered a person. Wanting equal pay. Struggling for everyone to be in charge of our own bodies. I’m fucking sick of it, too!

There is nobody in this world who wishes the idea of “feminism” could go the way of the dodo more than a feminist. Because that would mean that the world has achieved true equality, no matter one’s gender, sexual orientation, race, religion, cognitive and physical abilities, height, weight, or freaking Zodiac sign.

YOU think feminism is a pain in the ass? Try being paid less.  Try being blamed for your sexual assault. Try facing discrimination in public and private dealings. Try being threatened with death for speaking out. Ah, but that’s nothing, right? When a big, bad word makes you roll your eyes—that’s the real struggle. Just shut up and accept your role under the boot, you obnoxious bitches, geesh!

Time, you don’t fool us. The only reason to include “feminist” in the bad word list is as a big fuck you to everyone who’s not a drooling troglodyte desperate for the hand of time to spin back to the year 1400. Well, there weren’t magazines back then, so I guess I don’t need to open yours ever again. 

*That's a "do not link" link, so they won't get any hits off you.

Stupid Questions with Lucy:Wedding Pie is an AbominationFeaturing Karen McCullough

 

Answering my deep and insightful weekly questions this time is author Karen McCullough.  Take it away, Writer Smurf!

 

1. If you could have one otherworldly alien ability or body part, what would it be and why?

 

Another arm and hand. How many times have you been at a party, with a drink in one hand and a plate of food in the other, only to realize that you have no way to get that food from plate to mouth? Think how much more we could accomplish with another hand. I could write so much faster if I had three hands to type with rather than two. 

 

2. What Smurf would you be? 

 

Writer Smurf, of course! The one who always has a pen in hand and ink stains on his fingers. All the other smurfs would gather round him in the evenings to listen to his stories! 

 

3. Do you think the aliens who inevitably enslave the human race will treat us well or eat us?

 

Oh, they’ll probably take good care of us until our numbers begin to threaten them. We’ll make a wonderful set of exhibits in their zoo-they can watch us play with balls, swing from branches, draw in the dirt, build stone fortresses, make crude weapons like spear throwers and slingshots and reproduce like crazy. It’ll amuse them until they realize that we’ve got numbers on them. 

 

3A. Follow up: What will you do to distinguish yourself to our benevolent overlords so that they don't destroy you with their acid flatulence?

 

Me, I’m hiding behind all the big, aggressive guys and letting them handle the fight. I’ll be ready to help with the clean up and setting up the new order when they’ve cleared the way. 

 

4. What's the best way to foil a ghost? A smart one, not one of those dumbasses in a sheet.

 

I’m calling Ghostbusters. After all, their “courteous and efficient staff is on call 24 hours a day to serve all your supernatural elimination needs.” And on their best-known gig, they came, they saw, they kicked ass. Big, white, marshmallow ass. 

 

5. Cake or pie? And, if you said pie, why are you so happy to be wrong?​

 

No definitely cake. Pie is good for sure, but you can’t put birthday candles or sprinkles on pie, and you can’t write silly messages in the frosting. And really, two words: Wedding Pie. ‘Nuff said. 

 

About Karen McCullough:

 

Karen McCullough’s wide-ranging imagination makes her incapable of sticking to one genre for her storytelling. As a result, she’s the author of more than a dozen published novels and novellas, which span the mystery, fantasy, paranormal, and romantic suspense genres. A former computer programmer who made a career change into being an editor with an international trade publishing company for many years, she now runs her own web design business to support her writing habit. Awards she’s won include an Eppie Award for fantasy; three other Eppie finals; Prism, Dream Realm, Rising Star, Lories, Scarlett Letter, and Vixen Awards, and an Honorable Mention in the Writers of the Future contest. Her short fiction has appeared in several anthologies and numerous small press publications in the fantasy, science fiction, and romance genres. She lives in Greensboro, NC, with her husband of many years. 

 

Website, Facebook, Author Twitter 

 

Latest Release: The Detective’s Dilemma, a short romantic suspense novel published in paperback and ebook by Kensington’s Lyrical Press imprint. 

 

Available from:  Amazon, B&N, Kensington

 

 

 

Blurb: 

 

Although Sarah Anne Martin admits to pulling the trigger, she swears someone forced her to kill her lover. Homicide detective Jay Christianson is skeptical, but enough ambiguous evidence exists to make her story plausible. If he gives her enough freedom, she’ll either incriminate herself or draw out the real killers. But, having been burned before, Jay doesn’t trust his own protective instincts...and his growing attraction to Sarah only complicates matters. 

 

With desire burning between them, their relationship could ultimately be doomed since Sarah will be arrested for murder if they can’t find the real killer.