Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Ragnar VS. Ragnar: The Epic Battle!

Vikings do it in the ocean.  But they always use protection.

The hero of my first book, RAGNAR AND JULIET, is named Ragnar.  (SPOILER!)  It recently came to my attention that the History Channel has totes stolen this brilliant idea and has named the hero of their (pish!) TV show, Vikings, Ragnar as well.  I tuned in, friends, to see what they had gotten up to with MY *ahem* name.  I noticed that there were several key differences between the Ragnars.  I shall elaborate below so that my dozens of fans do not get my book mixed up with a big-budget television show.  Which is totally a thing that could happen!

Let's start with the sames.

Same 1:  Both Ragnars have pretty blue eyes, the better to bat them at... well, my Ragnar bats them at the heroine, Juliet.  Vikings Ragnar tends to bat his at his hallucinations, er, visions.  He enjoys wandering off along the shore, gazing at the sky and dreaming of what's across the ocean.  (Sea monsters?  Clothing with zippers?  Who can say?)

Same 2:  Both Ragnars have ships.  My Ragnar zooms about in a spaceship, because my book is set in space, and that sort of vehicle helps you not die in the cold, airless cosmos.  Vikings Ragnar has secretly built a ship for to travel west across the ocean to look for zippers, or whatever.  It will help him not die in the cold ocean.  It is possible that there will be space ships in future episodes of Vikings (perhaps for May sweeps).

Same 3:  Both Ragnars have taken up with kickass women who subdue would-be rapey assholes, which means the menfolk have excellent taste in ladies.  Take note, men!

The diffs:

(That's cool-speak for "differences."  I think.  I'm not very cool.)

Diff 1:  Viking Ragnar begins his story by gutting some unfortunate dude with a sword.  He doesn't even introduce himself!  It's all wham, bam, oops your guts are on my shoes now.  My Ragnar starts his book by having a cocktail.  If I had my choice of being gutted by or drinking with a sexy, blue-eyed fellow, well, I'd choose booze any day of the week.  But maybe I just really enjoy my Whiskey.

Diff 2:  Both the Ragnars' women are awesome warrior-types.  The main difference between them is that Juliet would never wear the long skirts that Lagertha does.  I mean, Juliet even wears a gynecologist-approved miniskirt when she impersonates a nun!  She ain't got time for no old-fashioned, knee-covering modesty sacks.  And that's why, at least comparing book 1 of the Ragnar and Juliet series to episode 1 of Vikings, Juliet gets laid way more often.  Take note, ladies!

Diff 3:  The Viking Ragnar has no tail, seeing as he is a human being.  My Ragnar has an adorable devil tail that likes to trail up your skirt, as he is an alien.  Thankfully, they both have the usual other male appendages.  I assume, anyway.  Viking Ragnar has not shown his off because he lives on basic cable.

In conclusion, if you enjoyed the butt-kicking in Vikings, you will probably like my books, too.  They are dirtier, anyhow, and that's always a plus.  However, my hero Ragnar never wanders off to spacey music and hallucinates.  You'll have to decide for yourself whether that's a good or a bad thing.

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