Tips for NaNoWriMo From a Gen-u-ine Author

• Every moment you spend crying is another moment you don't have to write.


• Great ideas often come when you aren't concentrating on them, like on December 1st.


• Never use adverbs, for they are often unnecessary.  Adjectives muck up the action.  And nouns -- WTF are those for?  Only use verbs and the word "Kardashian."


• Keep up a tally of your daily writing progress.  How else can you know how utterly fucked you are?


• Name all your characters after modern-day toddlers.  Jaydyn and Nevaeh and Mackenzee are timeless monikers that just scream "classic."


• Zombies are over.  Never write vampires.  Werewolves are tired, and you always have to keep track of where their clothes go.  Talking Diet Cokes are the new zombies.


• Drink.


• Remember, if you try, you've already succeeded!  FYI, don't go look up the definition of success after you tell yourself this.